FROM: MomDATE: Jan. 20, 2010
TO: Junior member of household
SUBJECT: Proper procedure for cleaning rooms
It has come to my attention that there has been a misunderstanding re: the phrase “clean your room.” “Clean your room” does not mean “shove everything in your closet and/or under your bed.”
Thank you.
FROM: Mom
DATE: March 18, 2010
TO: Junior members of household
SUBJECT: Proper procedures for feeding the dog
To prevent unwanted intrusion of undesirable rodents and/or insects, please utilize the following procedures for feeding the dog:
1. Remove container of dog food from panty.
2. Remove one-cup measure from container of dog food.
3. Fill one-cup measure with dog food.
4. Empty one-cup measure of dog food into dog food bowl.
5. Do not overfill dog food bowl!
6. Return one-cup measure to dog food container.
7. Return dog food container to pantry.
8. Shut pantry door.
FROM: Mom
DATE: June 23, 2010
TO: All members of household
SUBJECT: Proper refrigerator usage
If you took it out of the fridge, put it back in the fridge.
Exception No. 1: If you used all contents of container, place empty container in trash. Do not place empty container back in the fridge.
Exception No. 2: If the container you emptied is reusable, place it in the dishwasher. Do not place empty reusable containers in the trash.
Exception No. 3: If the dishwasher is full of clean dishes, do not place dirty reusable containers in the dishwasher. Instead, empty the dishwasher.
FROM: Mom
DATE: July 9, 2011
TO: All members of household
SUBJECT: Proper disposal of trash
Please place all trash in appropriate trash receptacles. The kitchen counter is not an appropriate trash receptacle.
Neither is the back seat of the car.
FROM: Mom
DATE: July 10, 2011
TO: Junior member of household
SUBJECT: Proper disposal of dirty laundry
Please place all dirty socks in appropriate receptacles. The floor is not an appropriate receptacle for dirty socks.
FROM: Mom
DATE: July 16, 2011
TO: All members of household
SUBJECT: Cabinet doors
If you open a cabinet door, close it when you are done.
FROM: Mom
DATE: Jan. 23, 2012
TO: Junior members of household
SUBJECT: Proper procedure for putting away laundry
1. Take basket of clean laundry upstairs to room.
2. If item(s) falls out of basket onto stairs, retrieve item(s) and replace in basket.
3. Put clothes that belong in drawers into drawers.
4. Drawers must be able to close fully afterwards.
5. Put clothes that belong in closet in closet.
6. Clothes that belong in closet should first be put on hangers.
7. Clothes on hangers should be hung on hanger rod.
8. Place empty basket in closet.
9. Place dirty clothes in basket as warranted.
FROM: Mom
DATE: Jan. 25, 2012
TO: Senior member of household
SUBJECT: Athletic clothing
Dear Sir,
Could you please remove the sweaty bike clothes from the executive co-ed bathroom? They are grossing out some of the more sensitive members of our organization. Thank you.
FROM: Mom
DATE: Aug. 13, 2012
TO: Canine member of household
SUBJECT: Barking regulations
Outdoor barking is hereby prohibited between the hours of 10 p.m. and 8 a.m.
